Living in bizarro world.

I'm an animal lover.  Mammals.  Not bugs.  Not reptiles.  Cute, fuzzy, warm animals.  We recently started seeing more and more bugs around here.  I drew the line at a black widow and brown recluse within a 24-hr period.  A call to the exterminator was made.  They came and sprayed the house, inside and out, on June 3rd.  Around about June 5th, I noticed a smallish spider that had taken up residence in the window above my kitchen sink.  It had a small web in one of the corners.  I didn't kill it immediately, and that was my mistake.

I am now living with said spider and its rather large web in my kitchen window.  I don't know what is wrong with me!  It's a spider!  I hate spiders.  For some bizarre  reason, I just can't bring myself to kill it.

I did, however, destroy its web one day last week, thinking it would just move on.  I hadn't seen it that day and hoped that it had just crawled off and died somewhere.  The next morning, I reached for the dimmer switch to the light above the sink and found my fingers in a sticky web.  Needless to say, I jumped back.  That particular outlet/light switch doesn't have a switch plate over it.  I grabbed the flashlight, only to see two tiny eyes glowing back at me from deep in the receptacle.  I told Reuben that was it.  He needed to kill it.  He laughed at me and refused.  Okay.  I don't need to turn on that light.  Ever.

By the end of the day, the spider was back in its comfy corner with a little web to call home.  The web grows a little more every day.  Reuben felt bad for the poor spider having lost its web and food supply, so he went in search of some food for it.  I admit it.  I also went hunting when he came back saying he couldn't find a single bug anywhere.  It was crazy.  There wasn't a bug to be found anywhere around our house.  Good but weird.  Reuben went hunting for a bug, again, later and finally found a tiny beetle under something by the dog pen.  He delivered it to the spider, and it pounced on it.

That was Sunday.  He brought it TWO such bugs yesterday.  As I walked to the sink this morning to wash my hands, that not-so-tiny-now spider had the nerve to jump out on its web.  I told Reuben it needs to go.  It's getting aggressive.  His reply?  "It's hungry.  It thinks you're going to feed it."  WHAT?!?  I have clearly lost my mind and am living in a bizarro world!  (It's a Seinfeld reference, for those that are wondering.)

A POSTSCRIPT TO THIS STORY:

Our resident spider finally met her demise on July 10th.  She had grown into a rather largish spider and had taken to killing her own kind in her sticky window web.  I had made a couple of attempts to smash her, but she was successful at retreating into the crevices of the window frame.  Her final moments were marked by her presence in my kitchen sink when I went to wash my hands.  She made a quick move in my direction, and I let out a squeal telling Reuben to kill it!  Now, my world is back in order.  No pet spiders.  :)

Just glimpses.

How well do you think you know your family?  Your friends?  Acquaintances?  I bet you feel like you know at least some people very well.  I also bet you don't really know anyone completely.  We are all untold stories.

I don't know about you, but my mind is a constant rolodex of random thoughts and subjects.  My brain is always on and always scrolling through this rolodex of things to consider or worry over or plan for or whatever.  I have very certain feelings about myself.  I know things about me that no one else on this earth knows.  A very few people know me pretty well, but most only know what I want them to know.

Take Facebook, for instance.  Some people, like me, post a lot on there.  I post only the things I don't mind others knowing about me and my life.  Occasionally, you might get a glimpse of struggles I'm facing, but you will never read the deepest, darkest truths about me there.  Similarly, most of us walk around with a facade that we consider acceptable for public viewing.  We let down some walls around close friends and family, but we don't tell our complete story to many people, if any.

Then, you have the people who share way too much publicly.  They're always airing their dirty laundry, only to crawl back into the same dirty old clothes time and time again.  Then, they wonder why so many people judge them.  Ummm.... didn't you just tell me what a scumbag that guy is?  Now, you're living happily ever after... for today?  Have you ever heard of the boy who cried wolf?  Yeah.  I'm not coming running when I hear you complain, anymore.  Those people also have an untold story.  They may not even realize it themselves, but there's a deeper story and disconnect there somewhere.

My point is, we only know what people want us to know.  We aren't seeing the full picture with most people.  For that reason, we should be slow to judge and quick to listen when they want to open up to us.

Let's talk about food!

So, this post might explain a lot about who I am.  I've reminisced about grade school, family, friends, etc.  Now, I will talk about my love affair with food.

My Grandma Horn was a phenomenal cook!  There were no shortcuts, no microwaves.  She had three meals each day.  She and my uncle sat down at the kitchen table for each meal.  It was never just sandwiches, either.  She cooked fresh meals or reheated leftovers on the stove.  We did often have cereal for breakfast, though.  Rice Krispies with lots of sugar and fresh cream.  Yes.  I said cream.  Heavy cream.  Don't judge.  It was heavenly!  They had a dairy farm, so the milk and cream were always super fresh. When I'm feeling really indulgent, I still will buy some heavy cream to put on Rice Krispies.  Grandma was faithful in keeping me supplied with my absolute favorite of hers for lunch.  Macaroni and meat with fresh tomato sauce.  Elbow macaroni, fresh ground beef, and fresh tomato sauce.  YUM!  I've tried and tried to replicate it, but I've never gotten it quite right.  Hers was special.  While I'm confessing some strange eating habits, I will tell you that I loved to scrape the sides of the ice cream box.  You know the sticky, gooey stuff that sticks to the sides?  Yeah.  I loved it!  I will admit that it was weird.  It grosses me out now.

My mom also had a knack for cooking.  I could never list all of my favorites that she made.  And many of the things I remember fondly were boxed foods.  Sadly, they just don't make them anymore!  For starters, let's talk about what we called dumplings.  They were actually a wide egg noodle in a chicken flavoring.  Yellow.  Yummy.  Again, I've tried to recreate these using egg noodles and chicken bouillon cubes.  It's good but not as good.

Then, there was this taco casserole thing with chips on top.  I loved it.  It came in a box.  The chips would turn all chewy in the baking process.  Mmmm.

My mom only used packaged brown gravy for one meal.  It was a loaf of meat with mashed potatoes.  It wasn't meatloaf.  It was a frozen loaf of fresh ground beef, cooked like a roast in the oven.  She would slice it up and serve it with mashed potatoes and packaged brown gravy.  I've yet to try this one.  I just can't bring myself to stick a frozen cylinder of beef in a roasting pan.

A favorite of mine was my mom's meatballs.  She rarely made them.  Occasionally, she would make them with spaghetti, but I preferred them just plain.  She'd make a batch of fried meatballs, and we'd eat them with fondue forks.  It was fun.  I actually made meatballs for supper tonight, which is what brought about these food memories.  Mine are almost as good as hers, not quite.

One last yummy memory of my childhood is lemon strudel cake.  It was a super moist lemon bundt cake with crunchy bits of lemony goodness in the center of each piece.  I've found a wonderful lemon bundt cake recipe, but it's missing those crunchy treasures.

So, to summarize, these are just a few of the reasons that I love food today.  I have such fond memories of happy times around the table.  Thanks, Mom and Grandma, for being such wonderful cooks!

Mine's Best!

There's a children's book called, "Mine's Best."  It's about two kids boasting about whose balloon is the best.  As I read through my Facebook timeline this morning (Father's Day,) that book came to mind.  So many friends are boasting about having the best dad in the world.  It makes me happy.  Each and every one of those who feel that they have the best dad should be thanking God today.  Not everyone is so lucky.

I couldn't help but think of the ones who I know that will most definitely not be boasting of their wonderful dads today.  Sadly, not all grow up with loving, nurturing dads.  I think it's important to think of those on this Father's Day.  They don't know the true meaning of celebrating fathers.  This is what I have to say to those...girls, marry the kind of man that you want as a father for your kids... guys, be the kind of dad you always wished you had.  Give yourself a reason to celebrate this day in the future.

I happen to be one of the lucky ones.  My dad is the best!  I grew up with a very present, very involved dad.  He was a professional guy, a principal and preacher.  Yep.  I know.  Their kids are always the worst!  I've heard it thousands of times.  Anyway, my dad got up every morning and put on dress clothes and held a position of authority in our community.  I often took some abuse from others because of this, but I didn't care.  I was proud of him and proud to be his daughter.  He's never been a mechanically inclined guy.  If a vehicle broke down, it was off to the shop.  If the house needed a repair, he called someone.  That's okay.  Those skills are not the measure of a man.  Faith. Compassion.  Integrity.  Work ethic.  Those are the types of attributes that make a man, and I can boast loudly and proudly that my dad is a living example of all of those.

I also am lucky enough to have married a man that is an awesome father.  Reuben and I have had our share of ups and downs over the years.  There have been times that I've questioned the depth of his love for me.  Then, I watch him father our boys, and I know that he couldn't possibly love our boys this much if he didn't love me, too.  They are part of me, a part of my heart that's living, breathing, and walking this earth.  I thank God for giving my children such a wonderful father.  I pray that they will follow in his footsteps.

There's another kind of father that I want to acknowledge today... the ones that didn't have to be father figures but choose to be, anyway.  My father-in-law is one such man.  He married my mother-in-law when she was very young with two very little kids.  Their birth father was also very young and not involved with their lives.  Robert chose to be their dad, not their step-dad but their dad.  He has been the dad in every way ever since.  Reuben will tell you that he only ever had one dad, and that is Robert.  Men like these deserve a special recognition on this day.

So, as I prepare to go to church and celebrate all of the special men that play the role as dad, I am thanking God for putting such great examples of fathers in my life.  Mine really is best!!

All that glitters....

We've all heard the saying, "all that glitters is not gold."  That is true.  Some of the shiniest rings will turn your finger green before they tarnish and find themselves headed for the trash.  Looks and feelings can be deceiving.

Ladies, have you ever been so upset with your husband that you go to bed hours earlier than usual, only to find yourself simmering mad while you lie there in wait?  You know your husband is eventually going to make his way to the bed, and you are not going to say a single WORD!  You wish you could just fall asleep and show him, but that frustration is working your brain overtime.  So you lie there.  Very still.  Very quietly.  Waiting.  Waiting.  Did I really go to bed THAT early?!?  Just wait!  I will make him think he's really made me mad enough to go to bed at 7pm and fall asleep without even talking it out with him.  Finally, you hear the TV shut off in the living room and lights being switched off.  Footsteps.  You are sure to be lying on your side, facing away from him, when he gets in the bed.  You are certain he will try to speak to you, kiss you goodnight, check to make sure you're still breathing...but nothing.  He crawls into the bed, and you hear snoring before his head hardly hits the pillow.  How dare he?!?  Doesn't he know I've just sacrificed hours of my life to get a reaction out of him?

Marriage.  It can be difficult at times.  We all handle problems differently.  Some people can let go of an issue as soon as it's over.  Others hold onto the angst as long as they can, with plans of using it as ammunition in some future confrontation.  Some people need the confrontation in order to feel closure on the subject.  That's me.  I want to have it out right now and get it over with, because you can bet that I won't forget about it!  It will only be worse if I hang onto it and let it fester.  My husband, on the other hand, is the quiet type.  Who knows if he's still mad, ever was mad, or will be mad later?  He's mysterious that way.  It's caused problems on more than one occasion, this difference in handling conflicts.

The plain fact is that all marriages and relationships will face turmoil at one time or another.  Most will even wonder if they made the right decision in being with that person.  Some will be faced with major obstacles and will have to decide if they can get past them or throw in the towel.  I feel like so many people are throwing in the towel without much thought as to whether the relationship is salvageable or not.  There's a big ol' pile of towels out there!

My marriage hasn't been perfect.  I feel stress, doubt, anger, hurt, and regret more often than I care to admit.  I'm still hanging onto my towel, though.  I know that we have our glittering moments, as well as our green finger moments.  I also know that the ring on my finger is, indeed, gold, and I'm not planning on going anywhere!

I prefer a storm window.

If the rain was blowing sideways and the thunder and lightning cracking right and left, would you prefer a storm window or a screen window as your protection?  I, for one, would pick the storm window.  It's solid and sure to keep the water out.  Well, guess what?  We're living in a storm of epic proportions, and most people seem to be content with a screen or no window at all.

The "news" of late has me feeling more than a bit distressed.  The world is singing the praises of sin from the mountaintops, and all too many "Christians" are poking holes in the Truth of the Bible to allow more and more sinful nature to become acceptable.  Sin is hiding under the disguise of "tolerance and acceptance," and God's Truth is being labeled as "hate and intolerance."  Believe me when I say that I can separate the person from their sin.  I don't hate the people that are being placed on pedestals.  I hate the behavior that is putting them there.  I hate that this crazy world that we live in worships the sin and condemns anyone who is brave enough to speak up and point it out.  

I had a dear relative that was gay.  No one ever sat me down and told me so, I just knew it instinctively.  He was a wonderful man, and I loved him, regardless of his lifestyle.  Yet, if asked to defend his lifestyle in order to avoid hurting his feelings, I would not have.  Sin is sin.  I loved him and never let his life choices affect that.  I didn't look down upon him, because I was no higher than he.  We are all sinful creatures.  He just chose to live a perpetually sinful life without any effort to repent and change his ways.  

There are far too many "Christians" today that jump on their soapboxes against sin and end up barking hate toward the persons sinning.  I have no patience for that.  I know it's a fine line.  How do you preach God's truth, which plainly states certain things as sin, without pointing judging fingers at the sinner?  It's difficult, and many end up hating the person.  I am ever aware of this and try my best to avoid that.  It's easier to point those judging fingers at a sin that we would NEVER commit ourselves.  But how about the "lesser" sins?  Wait!  There's no such thing, folks!  God doesn't rank sins in order of atrocity.  

If you're thinking you can't separate a person from their sin, consider someone with a different type of sin.  If your child became addicted to drugs, would you hate them or hate the drugs?  You'd hate the drugs, of course.  Try to see past the type of sin and remember that Jesus is a friend of sinners.  He loves us all, sinners that we are.  

Now, all of that being said, we do NOT have to love the sin in order to love the sinner.  I can still read God's word and recognize certain sin when I see it.  I do NOT have to hold you in high regard because of your willingness to wear your sin in public, unashamedly.  In fact, I should not herald you a hero just because you are willing to flaunt your sin in God's face. 

I will not take down my storm window to allow more sin to flow through the screen of today's world.  It's time to put on our armor, friends.  We are in a battle like none before, and it's life or death.  Now is not the time to be taking off your armor.  

"Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. 

Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil."   Ephesians 6:10&11